How Much More Do You Have For Me God???

I talk a lot about Love. The importance of it. I don't know, it has just kind of become something I have become rather passionate about. If you are reading this then I assume that you have heard that my Dad has been in the hospital suffering from anything from a bladder infection to a heart attack. Love has just been something God has been reminding me of lately, and I am just now starting to see his full purpose in telling me this.

My family, well, we have been through a lot. My dad had quadruple bypass surgery when I was in the third grade. That same year there was a hostage situation that took place down the road from my house. That had a rather dramatic effect in my life. I was later diagnosed with depression. Not exactly the thing you want to be while in the third grade, depressed, and I would never wish such a thing on any child. Anyways, things never really got any better. A good time for my family was usually defined by going a month without having anyone in the hospital. Needless to say it rarely happened. Sinus surgeries, knee surgeries, "terminal illness", more surgeries, plenty of stitches and concussions to go around resulted in pushing my family further and further apart.

Where am I going with this is my family has lost the love that families are suppose to have. I know now, as I remind myself of what James wrote, that this is a time to rejoice. It is the testing of my faith and I must persevere. I would like to add to that, hold my family together. The last couple of days it has just been the three boys, me and my two brothers. I have seen countless times how the family comes together in a time of crisis but never realized that we are divided in the peaceful times. Life is tough, I'll give it that. But I'm not going to fold. We must persevere, all of us, anytime we go through crap just remember what James wrote in his first chapter.

Love will set us free, as Brett Dennen says. I know it will.

Pray for my family as we go through this hard time. I just found out some more bad news today, another page in a whole new chapter in this life. Or as John Donne writes.

All mankind is of one author, and is one volume, when one man dies, one chapter is not torn out of the book, but translated into a better language; and every chapter must be so translated; God employs several translators: some pieces are translated by age, some by sickness, some by war, some by justice; but God's hand is in every translation; and his hand shall bind up all our scattered leaves again, for that library where every book shall lie open to one another.

I really like that analogy because it offers hope. I use to think that heaven will be somewhat boring, you know, just "worshiping God" the whole time for the rest of eternity. However now I see that it will be great, a feast, a time to share stories and commune with one another. I can't wait to get there and hear stories from Paul about his missions, to hear Elisha talk about what it was like to be the only person to never die, and to here Davids stories about his run from Saul. Who knows what we are going to hear when we get to heaven, I just can't wait.